seed

I have been neglecting this blog for a while since I've been having really late nights recently due to my college's 100th year celebration. Even now is pretty late >.<

I've been thinking a lot recently and my thoughts are a little scattered, but that's alright.

I tend to enjoy reading light novels instead of the Bible in my free time, to the point where I'll just spend three hours or so to finish - ignoring everything else until I'm done.

Today I read one of CS Lewis' works: Till We Have Faces.

It is really truly beautiful and forces me to stop and think and think because I am not certain what I am thinking or feeling right now. But the title is really the heart of the book, and almost the raison d'etre for why he wrote the book.

“I saw well why the gods do not speak to us openly, nor let us answer . . . Why should they hear the babble that we think we mean? How can they meet us face to face till we have faces?”

The implications of beauty and of selfishness and love and blindness are all in here. I am at once raising an eyebrow at the way he uses Greek mythology and their gods to allude to God himself, and another just blown away.

Another verse from 1 Corinthians 13
“Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”

I had not known. My search on CS Lewis also brought me to the Lewis trilemma and thoughts about how Jesus cannot be a great moral teacher but not God (he must be a liar, a madman, or God). Which makes me want to read Mere Christianity again ish.

There so much I still don't know about my own faith, revelations and apologetics and theories and just understanding. How can I say that I am comfortable with where I am in my relationship with God? I might think I am doing well, but more and more I want to know more of God and who He is and more and more of who I am so that this faith is grounded in truth.